Give acceptance, not pity

Hi everyone :) Welcome back. I have been extremely busy lately and haven't been able to write but it feels good to be back at it.

So today I worked at the local hospital. I am a CNA/Unit Clerk as needed there. I was talking with coworkers about Eli and this upcoming school year ahead of us(a whole other anxiety post to come later). While speaking with them, one of my closer friends asked how long Eli has been diagnosed and as I began to talk about it. While I was describing our story, another coworkers who I am acquainted with but do not know well walked up and asked what we were talking about. When I told her we were discussing my youngest having autism, she looked at me with pity and said "Awe, your son has autism?" I said "Yeah" while shaking my head.

Now that I've sat and thought about the conversation, I wish I would've said something more than Yeah. I wish I would've said "yes but it's not a sad thing. He's one of the happiest boys I know." Because it's not something to pity. But then I think back to when I used to react to people's statements about children with autism. And I remember having that pity she displayed today.

Here's the thing I can tell you folks who have little experience with autism. The last thing parents of ASD kids want is your pity. I am not mad at the girl who I referred to today because I know she did what she thought was the right thing. I understand that people display pity as a sign of empathy. The thing with ASD is that we don't need empathy or pity, we need acceptance and understanding. We want you all to be happy that were moving forward and that were overcoming our struggles. We want you all to respond with smiles instead of frowns. The positive reinforcements from understanding and acceptance is much more influential than the negative of pity.

"Be humble and gentle in every way. Be patience with each other and lovingly accept each other. "

-Taylor